How to Poop Quietly in Public Bathrooms

We don’t talk about pooping very often, if we’re being honest. People believe it is nearly forbidden to discuss it. Nonetheless, pooping is a natural occurrence for everyone. Thus, we should normalize such subjects.

You cannot escape pooping when the need comes. It doesn’t matter whether you’re in an office, mall, or hospital. But how can you be sure you’ll poop quietly without drawing attention to yourself?

Here’s how:

1. Master the Right Time

Knowing when to poop is crucial since it enhances your chances of not being noticed. While pooping is natural, you should know when to excuse yourself. Do not, for example, excuse yourself in the middle of a meeting. Everyone will know your plans, and all eyes and ears will be on you.

Also, don’t put off going to the bathroom until the last minute. Everyone wants to use the restroom at this time. The idea here is to be alone in the toilet to poop comfortably.

If you work in an office, poop when everyone else is distracted. Especially when everyone is pressed for time and trying to meet deadlines. No one will be interested in your business.

You can also poop early in the morning before your coworkers arrive. Or during lunch, when everyone takes a break, or in the evening when everyone leaves the office. In such cases, you can poop however you want without fear of embarrassment.

If you’re going on a date, it’s best to poop before you go. Yes, the restrooms in a restaurant may be reasonably far from the seating area, but what about the time you spend in the toilet? It can be awkward if you take too long in the restroom on a date. It’s even worse if you’re continually excusing yourself to use the bathroom. Particularly on a first date!

2. Make Sure the Doors are Closed and Make Some Noise

There are usually two doors. The main door leading to the washrooms and the individual doors themselves. Close all the doors to soundproof the noises you’ll make.

Turn on the exhauster if it is present. If your restroom has a faucet, turn it on. This may seem a little wasteful, but it is far preferable to the embarrassment that comes with your poop being heard.

Playing some music on your phone also helps with the noise. You can also sing along to add to the noise. If you are in the house, you will need to add the television volume.

A well-timed loud cough comes in handy in such a scenario. Another way you can add to the noise is to flush the toilet simultaneously when pooping. It can be annoying to flush two or three times, but very worth it.

3. Choose Your Toilet Stall Wisely

Whenever you go to a washroom with several stalls, ensure you go to the furthest one. The further you are, the further the poop sound. If you find someone in one stall, try to distance yourself at least two to three cubicles away from them. Also, if you can avoid the same washrooms as them, the better. Imagine loudly pooping then coming out only to find your workmates there. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing?

4. Use Tissue Paper to Prevent Plopping

Once you are in the toilet, cut a huge chunk of toilet paper and shove it in the bowl. The more tissue paper shoved inside the bowl, the better. The tissue papers will prevent your poop from making noise once it hits the water. It also prevents water from splashing back to you while pooping.

5. Manage the Speed

A high plopping sound comes from the way you poop. To control how loud your poop is, you need to manage your pooping speed. You may increase the speed or slow down.

When slowing down, you control how your poop comes out by releasing it bit by bit. Therefore, there will be no sounds when pooping. It is also advisable to drink water before pooping since it makes it easier to poop.

Strained pooping also allows you to implement other silent pooping techniques already discussed. Such as blasting music and singing.

Speeding up your poop is also beneficial, such that once you poop quickly, you are done very fast. It will be hardly noticeable that you went to poop. It would be best if you didn’t carry anything that will distract you in such a scenario, such as phones and tablets.

Ways to make yourself poop in a hurry

  • Take foods that are rich in fiber and supplements since you might not be getting enough fiber in your diet.
  • Drink at least 5-8 glasses of water.
  • If bad comes to worse, use a stool softener.

6. Correctly Aim Your Poop

Pooping directly into the bowl causes a splash, and everybody can hear the noise that comes with it. Apart from placing tissues in the bowl, you can also aim. You need to position yourself such that you are leaning on the edge of the toilet. This way, poop won’t land directly in the center, creating an embarrassing noise. It will instead hit the side of the bowl. Therefore, you will make little or no noise.

However, pooping this way has a downside. More often than not, you find your poop stuck on one side of the bowl. If there are stains left after flushing the toilet, it is advisable to wash the bowl.

7. Before You Let It Out, Relax

Several gastroenterologists who are knowledgeable on the subject advise this. Rushing yourself to poop puts an uncomfortable amount of pressure on your rectum, causing a loud sound whenever you try to discharge feces.

Therefore, you need to relax and take your time. This way, you will give the muscles in your bowel time to work slowly and carefully, hence less noise. An excellent way to poop is to sit on the toilet seat and poop at your own pace.

If the toilet seat is not clean, ensure to first clean it; you will then be more comfortable.

This is how you poop relaxed: Take a deep breath once seated on the toilet seat. Hold your breath for 10-15 seconds, and slowly breathe out using your mouth. Make sure you are not desperately trying to let the poop out. It will make you tenser; hence chances of pooping loud are more likely.

Breath in and out during the whole pooping session.

8. Avoid Consuming a lot of Dairies

You might wonder why you are being asked to avoid dairy, yet you are not lactose intolerant. Well, dairy products largely contribute to how we poop. Too much dairy products contribute to bloating, thus causing you to spend more time in the toilet. There are more chances of you making noises in the washroom in the long run.

9. Try to Force Yourself to Fart

Farting before you go to poop is essential. This will prevent you from making a loud fart once you are in the washroom.

How to Control the Fear of Pooping Especially in Public

First, you shouldn’t be afraid of pooping in public. Just like breathing, pooping is mandatory, and sometimes it’s difficult to control how loud it comes. However, these are some ways to help you manage that fear.

Learn from the experience of the older men. Have you ever noticed how carefree the elderly are? They don’t have to be embarrassed if they fart in public, like on a bus. “It just came,” they say most of the time. When they use a public restroom, the same thing happens.

They will poop however they want with no care in the world. Therefore, learn from them and know it is normal if you can’t control pooping loudly. It’s not like it has anything to do with your values.

Do not think about it. Do not worry about what everyone is thinking. After all, doesn’t everyone poop?

Everyone can be or has been in a similar situation to you. So, who are they to judge? Besides, even if it gets embarrassing, they will soon forget. It will be funny for a few minutes, and then everyone is back to their own business.

Remember that you don’t know these people; This applies mainly in malls, flights, hospitals, and public toilets. Know that there is a lesser percentage of meeting these people in life. Or rather, even if they meet you, chances are they will not remember you. If you have this in mind, you are less likely to worry about pooping in public.

Best believe when I tell you there are fewer judgmental people in the world than you think, especially on such matters. If you get out of that washroom with your head held high, in confidence, no one to talk about what happened inside the toilet. After all, no one is perfect.

How to Soundproof Toilets

Another way to prevent sounds from escaping the toilet is by talking to the management and asking them to install full-length doors. The usual bathroom stall doors don’t go all the way up. They leave an enormous gap of almost 12 inches; They only cover about 36 by 50 inches.

To make matters worse, they don’t close fully. Therefore, a full-length will come in handy. You can research other affordable options or ask opinions from your colleagues before presenting the idea to the management.

Soundproofing ideas for the bathroom

Other than making the door lengthy, you can drill the bathroom and install a rubber door sweep at the bottom of the main bathroom door.

You can also install a strip of self-adhesive striping tape. Such a tape will seal the door fully when closed, preventing any sounds from being heard.

Conclusion

We all have to poop every day, be it at work, home, or in public. It is completely normal. However, many people are not comfortable doing it in public as they are afraid of embarrassment from pooping noises. If they had it their way, they would simply hold in the poop until they get home. Unfortunately, it is not always possible hence the need to poop publicly but quietly.

To accomplish this, you must perform a series of distractions, illusions, and manipulations to confuse other toilet-goers. You’ll also need to create pleasant odors to counteract your foul ones.

If you still fail after taking such measures, try not to get worked up, there have been worse poopers before you, and you will not be the last.

Frequently Asked Questions

Pooping conversations are rare, which is unfortunate as people worry and wonder about many related things. This raises the need for a FAQ section to answer some questions you may have and are afraid to ask.

Is it usual to poop loudly?

Yes. The way in which most toilets are constructed contributes to loud noises. There may be no soundproofing and also poop tends to make noise when it hits the water. You have little control over such matters.

Additionally, when someone suffers from diarrhea, their bowel noises are often described as hyperactive. Muscle motions, gas, and fluid in the intestines come about with diarrhea. The noises of watery poo gushing through the intestines get louder.

Loud bowel sounds might also be a sign of malabsorption.

What causes the pooping to be so loud?

Severe diarrhea happens when the rectum gets full with way more gas and water than it can hold. Because of the releasing gas, passing the stool is frequently noisy. The World Health Organization (WHO) describes diarrhea as releasing three or more liquids or loose stools in one day.

What causes me to fart while I poop?

When the muscles inside the intestines are activated, you’re also more inclined to fart. Those muscles move the stool to the rectum when you’re going to have a bowel movement.

Other activities, such as exercise or coughing, might also cause flatulence.

Do you poop while you’re giving birth?

Many women do poop while giving birth. It occurs due to an influx of hormones, unsuitable baby position, or the fierce pushing that is involved when giving birth. It’s crucial to realize that this is perfectly natural.

Is it normal to take a dump seven times a day?

No, it is not. It is usual to poop 1-2 times per day, not seven times. If it’s only occasionally because of diarrhea or another problem, it’s fine. But if you’re having this problem regularly and it’s interfering with your everyday life, see a doctor. You may discover some issues with your liver. The sooner you talk with a doctor, the better.

Is it necessary for me to see a doctor about a poop problem?

It depends on the situation you’re dealing with and how much it’s hurting your life. It’s entirely up to you. If you don’t believe it’s a tremendous deal, that’s fine, but please see a doctor if you’re experiencing it regularly.

What is the most comfortable method to sit when pooping?

There are just two pooping positions that have been scientifically proven: sitting and squatting—sitting causes the knees to be even with the thighs and the shins to be parallel to the ground. Squatting involves raising the knees over the hips and forming a 45-degree angle with the legs. The quick explanation is that squatting puts less strain on the body.